Star Wars interview

Well I honestly can't believe that I am no longer a guest. So I wrote this with an attempt at humor (tried but didn't exactly get there)
Here goes the Star Wars talkshow... (keep in mind that our interviewee has had a bad day already before this)

Welcome to the Star Wars talk show!!! Today on our show is Mara Jade.

“She authored the new books Who Wants to be a Jedi Slayer and To kill a Skywalker.” says the host with much enthusiasm.

“So Mara, I can call you Mara right…”asked the host

“No, just call me Jade.”

“All right, Mara, OOPS, Sorry, Uhh, right, Jade…” The host fumbled through saying. “What is your point of view of the Jedi purge??” The host added.

“You probably already know from reading my book.” said Mara Jade, calmly.

“No, I’m sorry I never read your book Mara. Oh, Umm, wait I did. I did read the first page, I thought it was slightly boring and stopped immediately.” The host said with a yawn.

You could see just a crack of anger split her calm veneer.
With ever rising anger, “JADE IT’S, JADE, Not Mara!!!” “ Now to the real purpose of my visit to your show.” Mara Jade said with a wicked grin spreading across her face. She pulled her lightsaber from her belt and was about to flick it on when…

“Since you were unable to tell us about your first book Mara, Is it true that in your second book you confess your undying love for Luke Skywalker??”

“First of all, IT’S @#$%$#^ JADE, NOT MARA. And second of all, I HATE SKYWALKER!!!!! Do you honestly think that if I loved Skywalker the title of my book would have kill and Skywalker in the same line? And would the back cover say I hope to someday shoot the brains out of his head?” Yelled Mara Jade at the still smiling host.

“Tough love?? Questioned the host.

Before Mara Jade could reply, the host spoke again

"You saw it here folks, Mara has just admitted to an attempt to kill Luke Skywalker. Even though she just said I loved Skywalker in the same line"

Guards started rushing to the stage to escort mara off stage but the host interrupted...
"Could you please wait untill after my show to arrest her?"

The guards nodded and left the stage.

“You incompetent, Nerf Herding, Bantha Fodder.” Mara Jade screamed.

“That’s IT!! Whoever wanted to bring, Uhh, Whatever her name is on the show today. Have them FIRED!! She is oh, so loathsome and boring!! Fire them!!! Fire them NOW!!” Screamed the host with as much hatred as Mara Jade had earlier.

“I am NOT boring!! And before you go on another tangent, my true purpose for coming was to destroy YOU!! You are perhaps the worst Jedi host I have ever had the pleasure of killing.” Mara said anger now under control.

Mara Jades purple Lightsaber flashed into existence.

“You are looking a little purple, are you ill?” Asked the host.

“No I am not sick…” Mara Jade was interrupted.

“ It was probably your own performance that made you sick!!” Said the host through a fit of giggles.

“Enough!! I don’t have enough loyalty even to Palpatine to continue this mission to kill you. I would much rather suffer his wrath!!” Mara Jade said storming off the stage.

“How Rude!,” yelled the host to Mara’s retreating form.

“I’m not listening,” Jade yelled back.

“Worst guest ever!” screamed the host.

“Still not listening”, Mara screamed, before a door slammed leaving the stage in silence.

The audience erupts into applause.

And the guards go swarming out the door to capture Jade.

“Thanks for coming to today’s show, next time we interview Darth Vader.” said the host with a wide grin.