Thursday, July 13, 2006

Silence By: Oboe-Wan

“The Emperor will show you the true nature of the Force. He is your new master now,” Darth Vader declared to Luke Skywalker, motioning for the guards to take Luke away. Confidence in the Emperor and the mission to turn Luke to the dark side swelled in his mechanical circuits.

Luke looked up. Vader felt as if Luke’s eyes could see straight through him. “Then my father is truly dead.” The guards led Luke through the door at the end of the corridor. As soon as the sliding door shut behind them, Vader paused to look out at the Endor forest before him. Just beyond the landing platform was a small pond where a duck was being trailed by her ducklings across the glassy surface. Today, he thought, is either the first or the last day of my life. He turned and exited through the same door Luke had been taken.

Beyond the door was the passenger bay of his personal shuttle which would take him and his son to meet the Emperor on the Death Star. The guards were seated on either side of Luke. Vader swept into the shuttle, the door sliding shut behind him. The guards shifted as Vader took his seat at the top of the small room. Luke did not make any indication he had noticed Vader so close to him.

The engines whirred to life and the shuttle lifted off the platform, headed to the Death Star. Luke now turned his head slightly so that he had a better view of Vader. He could feel the vibrations of the shuttle under his feet. But there was something else, something just beneath his ribs; something dark, something alluring. Was Vader tempting him to change his mind? Luke pushed the sensation away, digging deep into the Force to keep himself from probing the dull blackness that was pressing in on him. He knew he must keep himself shut off from the Force if he was to survive this battle.

Vader could feel Luke pushing him away. But he wanted in. He wanted to break through his son’s idealistic notion that the light side of the Force would save him. That there was any chance he could be turned. It was impossible. His path was chosen - by him and for him. But Luke was so strong. He could feel the barrier that Luke had created around himself.

My father is truly dead. The words echoed through Vader’s head as loud as if Luke were continually repeating them even as they sat in the shuttle. For one of the only times in his life he was thankful for the mask that covered his face and hid the expressions that passed over his features.

My father.... Anakin. Darth Vader. Luke’s father. Anakin, Jedi, husband, friend, and now father. Anakin: the young man who thought knowledge of the dark side meant defense, but in the end couldn’t escape its sweet temptations. Darth Vader, machine, Sith, corpse. Vader shuddered. He was a corpse encased in armor and life support machines. He felt anger rising in him. An anger he hadn’t felt since his first years in the suit. Immortality, he scoffed privately. At what price?

Luke felt a surge of darkness press through him again. What was Vader doing to him? When would this shuttle land so he could face his destiny? Patience, a familiar and gentle voice coached. Luke breathed deeply and exhaled slowly through his nose, closing his throat slightly to generate heat in his body that would hopefully push away the cold chill spreading from Vader’s probe.

...is truly dead. Dead. Vader licked his lips and felt the cold chill of his own skin. Dead. He may be dead before the day is over and would that be the worst scenario? Perhaps killing the Emperor and taking his place with Luke at his side was not the best outcome. Perhaps there would be a way to allow Luke to destroy both master and apprentice and end this existence.

The image of a woman entered his thoughts. She had recently begun to materialize in his mind when he thought of Luke. She sacrificed herself so their child would survive. Survive his father. Her sacrifice will have been in vain if Luke dies at his father’s hand, or worse: turns to the darkside.

The engines began to slow as the shuttle approached the Death Star. Voices in the cockpit ran through security checks. Time was approaching. In his mind, Vader's plan was floating, evolving, changing. Facing Palpatine without a solid plan was a dangerous thing.

Luke continued to stare directly at Vader and Vader held his son’s gaze. Both men were about to meet their destiny. Vader was prepared to kill both Luke and Palpatine if it came to it. As the shuttle settled gently onto the landing bay’s polished floor, father and son stood.

May the Force show me the way. Though surprised that it was not his own voice in his own head, Vader secretly agreed with his son. Destiny was upon them. It was time to relinquish control over fate and allow the Force to flow through him as it hadn’t for years uncounted.

16 comments:

YoshiYoda said...

Deep... ;) Nice fanfic, Oboe. It was very emotional. :)

DragonFang said...

Wow... very good! I loved getting into their heads, in that familiar scene (and beyond).

leialookalike1 said...

Loved it dear Oboe

Hansgirl3 said...

I loved how you went back and forth between the two and gave us both sides; Father and son.

I saw only a couple of grammatical errors, but other than that awesome!

Lisa S. said...

Thanks you guys. Can you show me exactly where the grammar problems are? I know that writing & reading something objectively are impossible.

Thanks.

Hansgirl3 said...

His confidence in the Emperor and their mission to turn Luke together swelling in his mechanical circuits.

This is a sentence fragment.

Hansgirl3 said...

Luke did not make any motion that he had noticed Vader so close to him.

I'm not sure what is wrong with this sentence. Perhaps a word is left out of it?

Hansgirl3 said...

Something dark, something alluring.

Fragment again. Perhaps attach it to the sentence before with a semi-colon.

That's all I have. :)

Lisa S. said...

Ok, Hansgirl, check out the changes. As soon as you pointed them out, they became so obviously "weird"!!!

thank you.

Lisa S. said...

You know.... I tried to imagine how long the shuttle ride from the surface up to the planet would be and then go from there. How much could I pack into a 10 or 15 minute ride?

Now the reason I didn't do dialogue was twofold:

1) I was afraid of going against their characters. You know, one thing sounds out of character and the whole thing becomes silly.

2) I was afraid of having them say something that would go against the storyline of the movie. I guess I could have Luke try to convince his father to go with him again, but I don't think I could come up with dialogue as good as the ROTJ scene.

Also, I thought the two of them in the shuttle would be sort of a spin on the Qui-Gon/Darth Maul scene where Maul is pacing while Qui-Gon meditates.

Believe me, I had to think long & hard about whether or not I'd actually use dialogue!

Diviner525 said...

1. This is an interesting moment that you chose to write about, and I like that you went back and forth between their thoughts. The format of the story was very good.

2. I believe the line from RoTJ was, "The Emperor will show you the true nature of the Force. He is your master now." Or something to that effect.

3. Vader doesn't yet realize that Leia is his daughter. At this point in the story Vader thinks that Luke is his only child, and he would not have the thought that Padme had died to protect their "children".

4. I was surprised to read in the ending that Vader didn't have a "plan" regarding this meeting with the Emperor. That didn't sit well with me, since to me Darth Vader and Palpatine had been planning on working together to turn Luke to the Dark Side - and if Luke couldn't be turned then Vader most likely would be preparing himself for the fact that they may have to destroy Luke. This was a momentous occasion for Vader, one that I would have figured he had been playing out in his mind many, many times. It struck me as odd that Vader seemed to be unprepared for this meeting with Palpatine and Luke.

Bryan said...

I noticed that most of the paragraphs were about Vader's thoughts, with only a few about Luke. I would suggest either filling out more of Luke's thoughts, or removing his and focusing entirely on Vader. I recommend the latter.

GoKnight said...

Had to read this Oboe Wan. For you to write a fanfic titled "Silence" -- well, that says a lot right there!

I think the silence between them was important to the scene and it drove the tension. I liked it. I felt it!

I agree with the comments about Vader not having a plan.

I liked the descriptions of Vader and his mechanical circuits; licking his lips, etc.

Wonderful fanfic, I'm really enjoying this.

Loved the ducks!

ewanandhaydenfan5 said...

Great story. I liked the fact that there was hardly any dialoge...it allowed more time for the insights into Vader's and Luke's thoughts, although I also would have liked a little more focus on Luke. And I also agree that Vader would have had more of a plan before he confronted Palps.
Like Leialookalike1's story, this was something I wish would have been more fleshed out in the movies. But I can see it happening much like your story describes.

Lisa S. said...

Thanks again for the great comments. Here's what the latest edit has brought:

1) change from "children" to "child" because I'm a dumbass who forgot DV doesn't know about Leia yet. My bad.

2) change from DV having no plan because you're right, that doesn't make much sense. Good point you guys.

______________

So the "silent" thing, like I said, was to mirror the Maul/Qui-Gon scene. I don't believe Luke & DV would have spoken on the way to the Death Star - it would have been an intimidation game.

Now... why aren't there more of Luke's thoughts? I guess I wanted Luke to be shutting himself off from DV, keeping his thoughts private so as not to give away the secret of Leia. If he allowed DV to really get into his head (in this case, the reader as well) then he may divulge some secrets he doesn't want known. Luke is closed off to Vader, therefore Luke is closed off to the reader. Luke's few paragraphs just deal with him pushing Vader away, not letting him read his thoughts.

___________

you guys have been GREAT sources of advice & ideas and I'm SO glad I decided to submit this piece. I wasn't going to at first, not sure I was ready to have anyone read my writing, but I don't regret a minute of it! Keep the comments coming!!!

Lisa S. said...

And, yes, Diviner, you were right on the line. I changed that as well!